The lost lighter and some fiction

Well, Ben's gone and lost his very expensive lighter; what a muppet! The Zippo case itself was solid silver, which he had engraved with "Lord B.M. Chamberlain" (he had his title changed to "Lord" by deedpoll for the sheer fun of it, so he is genuinely "Lord") and he had the four diamonds from his ex girlfriend's commitment ring set into it - lol! Well, she asked if he wanted back all the jewellery that he gave her after they broke up so his attitude was "Yeah, okay, if you're offering!" lol! I took great joy in comparing those diamonds to the ones that are on MY finger =)

However, after about a week, he's a lot less upset about it, and thinks he wants to get another one, this time maybe with an emerald, a diamond, an amethyst and maybe a sapphire or tanzanite. I'm buying the stones =) I wanted to buy the whole lot but he won't let me!

Anywho, what I'm about to post below is the piece I wrote for my first Creative Writing assignment, and I got 74% for it from my tutor, so I'm confident enough to put it up here. Nothing brilliant, just something based on a personal experience. The basic idea is the same, but the physical encounter, words, characters and setting are completely different. I didn’t want to write an autobiographical piece; I wanted to focus more on character thoughts and feelings, specifically of the guy, which I wouldn’t be able to do with a piece of autobiography. I also felt that in reality me and the guy in question were too calm to make an interesting piece from it! There isn’t much character development – since it’s only a short piece and I wanted to make the most of it – but it does hint that the male character may still have feelings for the ex-girlfriend. In my first draft in my notebook, the characters were still a couple, but I thought it could be more interesting if they were ex-partners, since that's also what we were. I didn’t wanna write more on the events before or after 'cause I would have had to cram it all in, so I left it comfortably under the word limit. The rail influence came from my train journeys to Ben's and I took loose inspiration for the guy from something I jotted in my notebook. I was on the train to Ben's and as it pulled in to Guildford I saw a young bloke, only about a year or two older than me I reckon, sat on a bench looking pretty worried/nervous with his head in his hands and I wondered what was on his mind. I love people watching on the train! Nearly always sitting in my little corner at the back on the right XD
Anyway, I think it turned out pretty well, but its far from perfect! (Try to) Enjoy...



He stared out of the window, looking out across the Berkshire countryside as raindrops lashed towards him, thudding against the pane and streaming down it. He ran a hand through his abundance of thick, dark hair, his body swaying slightly with the gentle rocking of the carriage.

Please don’t let her be, he thought to himself, grimly. His ex girlfriend had sent him a text the day previously, simply saying, “I’m late… I’m sorry.” He sighed. He was twenty-two. Too young to be a dad! He thought to himself. But suddenly, thoughts of him were interrupted; what about her? All this time he had only been thinking of his own skin, but how was she was coping? His stomach lurched as an enormous pang of guilt swept through him. God only knows how she must be feeling, he thought. Although they had only been together for a couple of months, they had been friends before that and he still held great affection for her; he still cared for her.

It was approaching her twenty-first birthday, but all his thoughts of what he might buy her had been put swiftly on the back burner for now. He was grateful at least that she worked in the ticket office at London Paddington. The fact that he had to pay a little more for a train ticket than to tank up his car was a minor detail. It would save him a lot of trouble. He shivered. It was oddly cold for September. Surely it couldn’t be much further? ‘Ladies and gentlemen, we will shortly be arriving at Reading, Reading our next station stop in a few moments’ time.

'Ugh!’ This was uttered somewhat louder than he had intended, earning him a rather stern glance from an oriental-looking couple across the aisle. Another half hour? ‘Pfft,’ he breathed, far quieter than his previous expression of annoyance. He turned to continue looking out of the window, glaring at the fog and clouds for depressing him further, as the rain continued its relentless attack on the countryside.

‘Ladies and gentlemen, we will shortly be arriving at London Paddington, London Paddington our final stop where this service will terminate.’
He woke with a start to the voice over the tannoy. The last time he blinked he was pulling into Reading station, now he was in the centre of London! He yawned, stretching out his six-foot frame. That felt lovely. Then he remembered why he was there, and the feeling of bliss was quickly erased. As the train pulled up, he could see her waiting anxiously out on the platform, still in her work uniform, her mahogany hair tied back and clipped up. Despite this he was happy to see that she didn’t look in any way restricted as her long fringe fell out of position and hung about her beautifully pale face. His chest and shoulders heaved and he let out a deep sigh as he made his way to the door. Although he wasn’t looking forward to the potential stress of the next couple of days, he still felt his heart skip a beat when he saw her. He wasn’t sure why… but it would be good to see her again. He smiled slightly as he pulled on his hoodie and waited for the doors to unlock.

She spotted him as he stepped off the train, and ran along the platform towards him, throwing herself into his arms. ‘I’m so sorry,’ she sobbed into his shoulder.
He blinked blankly, looking down at her, still a little taken aback at her unusually high expressions of emotion. ‘Hey,’ he said, as softly as he could over the noise of bustling crowds and announcements, ‘it’s not your fault, is it? And anyway, it takes two…’ he trailed off, feeling terrible about the position he had potentially put her in and hanging his head a little in shame. He wiped away the tears which had rolled down from her warm, deep brown eyes and hugged her tightly. The smell of her hair was a combination of diesel engines and food stands. He kissed the top of her head, desperate to comfort her. ‘Come on you,’ he said, ‘home.’



Rayness out!